Sometimes you will get answers, but they aren’t the ones you were expecting. The answers also may not have a clear solution linked to them. What happens next is often unknown. Possibly, there will be a need to accept that you may have to live a life different than you intended. That is a tough pill to swallow.
The events of last week are a blur. I feel like I went to hell and back in the form of several visits to Hershey, Pennsylvania. I arrived with feelings of hope and came home in pain and with confusion.
The test that was supposed to show a fixable problem showed nothing. A second test showed a problem that can’t be fixed. It left me feeling sicker physically than I ever had in my life. Emotionally, I have yet to fully process it. The need to adapt and adjust will have to occur. There is no other option.
At some point, I will write the whole story out- but this is it for now.