I can count on one hand how many special occasions that were meant for me (birthdays and Mother’s Day ) that I have made it through without tears since I have had kids. It’s my fault, really. My expectations are too high, so it’s very easy to be disappointed. I have these delusions of grandeur that I will have these perfect days where I sleep in late, receive breakfast in bed, and have a fun outing with perfectly behaved children, who get along splendidly. I can’t blame my husband. He typically goes out of his way to get me flowers, cooks for me, cleans, and will take the kids so I can relax. He would let me sleep in if my body allowed me. Unfortunately since having kids, I haven’t been able to sleep past 7 am, unless I’m hungover or ill. Even when hungover, I’m still up at the butt crack of dawn. If I sleep till 9 am, be worried about me. It either means something happened to me or my children. I have sadly lost my ability to sleep.
My kids on special occasions somehow manage to fight as much as humanly possible and typically like to share how I am a terrible mother & have ruined their lives. They are still young, so i can’t wait to see what gems they come up with they are older.
Possibly, I should lower my expectations and not expect these days to be perfect. Children have a hard time seeing beyond themselves and fully recognizing the importance of others, as much as they love them. I know my children’s love for me is unconditional. As much as I lose my temper with them, I see how resilient they are and how my anger doesn’t phase them. Long standing grudges against their parents really do not seem to exist at this age. I know they love me no matter what and I feel the same for them even though they have pushed me close to my breaking point. Professionally, I have seen children who have been brutally abused, neglected and molested by their parents. Despite, these awful situations these children often still express their love for them.
Tomorrow, I will do my best to enjoy the day and appreciate my family. I will try not to expect perfection because it does not exist in families. If someone says otherwise, they are full of it.
Happy Mother’s Day to all the mommy’s out there! Happy Mother’s Day to my own mom, who taught me that it’s alright to be less than perfect and to love unconditionally. A special shout out to my mother in law as well, who loves me like her own.